Treat yourself like an ANGEL

abstract angelic art blast

Photo by Sebastian Voortman on Pexels.com

As Seth Gillihan points out many of us struggle with a general negative feeling about ourselves. Maybe you think awful things about yourself—that you’re stupid, disgusting, unlovable, or worthless. Perhaps you’re constantly on your own case about not doing enough, or “messing up” everything you try. Or maybe it’s hard to find words for your sense of inadequacy, and while you don’t believe you’re bad, you have a chronic sense of not being happy with yourself.

It’s hard to feel at ease when you have a pervasive feeling that, in some fundamental way, you’re not OK. Self-neglect can be more subtle but similarly damaging. We might be very considerate toward everyone in our lives except for the person who inhabits our own skin.

Try these four strategies to show yourself some care:

  • Take the time to plan your day in a thoughtful way.
  • Prepare a nice lunch for yourself.
  • Carefully consider your own needs and how you can meet them.
  • Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you.

It’s very difficult to force ourselves to feel a certain way about who we are. Changing unhelpful thoughts is useful to some extent, especially if those thoughts are overly harsh and simply not true. Try replacing any negative self-talk with a positive framework. As an example, try treating yourself like an ANGEL:

A – Awesome
N – Nice
G – Goodhearted
E – Exceptional
L – Loveable idiot (reserved for very special occasions only 😜).

While ‘loveable idiot’ term was coined by Alain de Botton in the context of interpersonal relationships, I think it applies very well to  our relationship with ourselves and helps us to learn to treat ourselves with laughter rather than criticism…

Not all angels reside in heaven.
Some walk the earth.
Just like you…

THE END

Adapted from Psychology Today

Depression in men

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Depression is an illness that affects both men and women. While men suffer from depression just as often as women, they are less likely to talk about it or ask for help.

Like women with depression, men with depression may:

  • Feel sad, hopeless, worthless or empty
  • Feel extremely tired
  • Have difficulty sleeping or sleep too much
  • Not get pleasure from activities usually enjoyed

Other behaviors in men that could be signs of depression include:

  • Escapist behavior, such as spending a lot of time at work or on sports
  • Physical symptoms, such as headaches, digestive problems and pain
  • Problems with alcohol or drug use
  • Controlling, violent or abusive behavior
  • Irritability or inappropriate anger
  • Risky behavior, such as reckless driving
  • Weight increase or loss

Overeating — particularly the high-fat, low-nutrient foods people are more prone to binge eat — can lead to or worsen depression.

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Men often turn to drugs or alcohol to try to cope with their emotional symptoms. Nearly one-third of people with major depression also have an alcohol problem. Often, the depression comes first with alcohol making it worse. Alcohol is a depressant. That means any amount you drink can make you more likely to get the blues. Drinking a lot can harm your brain and lead to depression.

Bachelor

Alcohol abuse and depression are both serious problems that you shouldn’t ignore. If you think you have a problem with either, talk to your doctor. There are lots of choices when it comes to medication that treats depression, and there are drugs that lower alcohol cravings and counter the desire to drink heavily. Depression, even if it’s severe, usually improves with medications or psychological counseling (psychotherapy) or both.

Other things that may help include:

  • Spending time with other people and talking with a friend or relative about your feelings
  • Increasing your level of physical activity and exercising  regularly
  • Engaging in activities you typically enjoy, such as ball games, fishing or a hobby.
  • Breaking up large tasks into small ones, and tackling what you can as you can. Don’t try to do too many things at once
  • Delaying important decisions until you feel better. Discuss decisions with others who know you well.
  • Keeping stable daily routines. For example, eating and going to bed at the same time every day.
  • Having a balanced diet
  • Avoiding alcohol

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Have you ever battled depression?
What helped you the best in your battle?

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Sources:

Credits:

Take a Look in the Mirror and repeat to yourself…

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I’m a very special person,
 There’s no-one else like me.
 If you searched the whole world over,
 My twin you’d never see.

My looks, my thoughts, my feelings,
 Are mine and mine alone.
 They often make me happy,
 But sometimes make me moan.

I’m a very special person,
 And I’m sure that you’d agree
 If everyone was perfect
 How boring life would be.

                                           (Author unknown)

Be

THE END

 Photo: ‘What’s behind Malevich’s square’ by Sergey K.

How can I improve my self-esteem?

How Can I Improve My Self-Esteem?From http://teenshealth.org/

“Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself as a person. Those with high self-esteem believe that they are adequate, strong and worthy of a good life, while those with low self-esteem feel inadequate and worthless. Low self-esteem can develop in childhood and continue throughout adulthood, causing great emotional pain. Therefore, it’s important to develop a healthy, positive sense of self.

From http://www.erepublik.com

Many people base their self-esteem on external factors, such as how much money they earn, how much they weigh and whether people like and appreciate them. If one of these external variables change, self-esteem can be broadly affected. For example, if your self-esteem is based on the fact that someone else loves you, then you risk feeling extremely vulnerable and worthless if that person’s love ends. By the same token, building self-esteem is not an easy task if you have been abused or have suffered years of personal or professional failure.

From http://reikouken.blogspot.co.nz

Building your self-esteem and creating a positive self-awareness comes from taking an inventory of your own strengths and abilities as a human being. Being at peace with who you are and what you have to offer the world is a major part of having high self-esteem. This “inner peace” does not mean that you are unaware of your weaknesses; it merely means that you accept who you are and genuinely like the person you have become.

From http://www.whisperoftheheart.net

You should think about yourself as deserving of attention, admiration and proper maintenance. Avoid the pitfall of paying too much attention to the happiness and well-being of others and too little to your own.

From http://imgfave.com/

If you struggle with low self-esteem, it is often helpful to connect with others with the same problem.


From http://www.self-esteem-experts.com

Beginning the inner dialogue about who you are and what you have to offer the world is an important process in building self-esteem.

Positive self talkFrom http://www.pinterest.com/

Talking to friends, family and colleagues can also be useful in further defining who you are and what you have to offer.

From http://www.wikihow.com

 But remember that the most important conversation you have about self-esteem is with yourself. Become your own personal cheerleader. Don’t be afraid to celebrate even your smallest successes. Ask yourself what you fear, and search within yourself for ways you can cope with these worries and fears.

Talk to yourself like you would go someone you love.

From http://www.pinterest.com

Learning to know and trust yourself is a long but worthwhile process. Throughout life you may need to search within yourself again and again to find your own empowerment and strength.”

From Building Self-Esteem

BE HAPPY WITH THE PERSON YOU ARE!!!


From http://www.sodahead.com

 

12 simple suggestions for building confidence and self-esteem:

1. Make three lists: one of your strengths, one of your achievements, and one of the things that you admire about yourself. Try to get a friend or relative to help you with these lists. Keep the lists in a safe place and read through them regularly.

2. Think positively about yourself. Remind yourself that, despite your problems, you are a unique, special, and valuable person, and that you deserve to feel good about yourself. Identify and challenge any negative thoughts that you may have about yourself, such as ‘I am a loser’, ‘I never do anything right’, or ‘No one really likes me’.

3. Dress in clothes that make you feel good about yourself.

4. Eat good food as part of a healthy, balanced diet.

5. Exercise regularly.

6. Ensure that you are getting enough sleep.

7. Manage your stress levels.

8. Make your living space comfortable, and attractive. Display items that remind you of your achievements or of the special times and people in your life.

9. Do more of the things that you enjoy doing. Do at least one thing that you enjoy every day, and remind yourself that you deserve it.

10. Do something nice for others. For example, strike up a conversation with the person at the till, visit a friend who is sick, or get involved with a local charity.

11. Try to spend more time with those you hold near and dear.

12. Avoid people, places, and institutions that treat you badly or that make you feel bad about yourself. This could mean being more assertive.

(By Neel Burton)

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