When Christmas is difficult…

Lonely Christmas

No matter where you find yourself in the world during the month of December, there’s never any escaping Christmas expectations. Seasonally, this is supposed to be a time for family and loved ones – and we’re constantly reminded of how we should be celebrating, through films, adverts and songs on the radio. But for those of us facing a difficult Christmas this year, that’s the last thing we want to be reminded of…

There is a number of reasons why many people find Christmas season very difficult including death in the family, loss of a job, loss of a marriage or relationship, financial collapse, loneliness, depression, or family problems.  A study into festive despondency by psychiatric healthcare facility Florida House found that 29 per cent of people feel depressed at Christmas because it reminds them that they don’t have anyone to share it with. Meanwhile, for 69 per cent it simply makes them realise how broke they are…

Are you facing a difficult Christmas season? Are you overly stressing about what needs to be done or the upcoming family gathering?  Are you isolating yourself from all of it and everyone?

Christmas.jpg

So, if you are feeling like the only person in the world who is not filled with festive joy, how can you make it through Christmas?

  1. Keep things simple. Keep your schedule simple. Keep your commitments simple. Don’t be afraid to say “no.”
  2. Balance alone-time and time with others. Don’t isolate. Isolating will only make things worse.
  3. Talk about the issues with someone who is safe. Talk about why it’s a difficult Christmas, but don’t ruminate about it. Identify the pain and work through it.
  4. Do self-nurture. Take time to de-stress. Find gifts for yourself, pamper yourself, go for a long walk, read a book and wear your pyjamas all day if you want to.
  5. Give something back. Christmas is a great time to volunteer and there are always people who need assistance; helping out at your local Church or charity car boot sale is a great place to start.
  6. Lower your expectations. In fact, try to have no expectations. Too often we have too high of expectations, and the disappointment that follows when those expectations are not met will only add to one’s pain.
  7. Ignore the media. The schmaltzy ads and poignant songs can bring back many memories. At times this may feel overwhelming and trigger some pretty intense emotions. (This is totally OK). But when things get too much, it’s a good idea to mute those telly ads, switch off the car radio and completely disconnect from social media. And if you still need an escape, consider celebrating Christmas somewhere where you won’t be reminded so much of home or the person you miss…

Sources:

Credits:

Tears of a clown

From http://www.deviantart.com

Old and tired he lives alone
The world forgot the love he shown.
A tear rolls down his saddened cheek
Once strong willed now getting weak.

Another chapter in his book
What did he write? Let’s take a look!
He wrote of goodness in mankind
And peace on earth within his time.

When love was pure and innocent
In God we trust that’s what it meant.
Our flag flown high we all were proud
Sat back relaxed and watched the clouds.

I closed the book to his surprise
Not looking up he did ask why.
There’s too much good in this book
You will not get a second look.

No one will spend the time to read
They want violence, crime, sex and greed.
The thousand goods that you have done
They’re all forgotten one by one.

You have to have an evil deed
And only one is all you need!
Rename the title as to read
You’ll be remembered guaranteed.

Once a clown his smile now gone
With tears of life and face withdrawn.
I hear him speak, a quiet voice
“Don’t mankind know~~ they have a choice.”

From Our Poetry Corner


From http://dzpal.deviantart.com

“You ever have that funny friend, the class-clown type, who one day just stopped being funny around you? Did it make you think they were depressed? Because it’s far more likely that, in reality, that was the first time they were comfortable enough around you to drop the act. The ones who kill themselves, well, they’re funny right up to the end….

Here’s how it works…

1. At an early age, you start hating yourself. Often it’s because you were abused, or just grew up in a broken home, or were rejected socially, or maybe you were just weird or fat or … whatever. You’re not like the other kids, the other kids don’t seem to like you, and you can usually detect that by age 5 or so.

2. At some point, usually at a very young age, you did something that got a laugh from the room. You made a joke or fell down, and you realized for the first time that you could get a positive reaction that way. Not genuine love or affection, mind you, just a reaction – one that is a step up from hatred and a thousand steps up from invisibility. One you could control.

3. You soon learned that being funny builds a perfect, impenetrable wall around you – a buffer that keeps anyone from getting too close. The more you hate yourself, the stronger you need to make the barrier and the further you have to push people away. In other words, the better you have to be at comedy.

4. In your formative years, you wind up creating a second, false you – a clown that can go out and represent you, outside the barrier. The clown is always joking, always “on,” always drawing all of the attention in order to prevent anyone from poking away at the barrier and finding the real person behind it. The clown is the life of the party, the classroom joker, the guy up on stage – as different from the “real” you as possible. Again, the goal is to create distance. You do it because if people hate the clown, who cares? That’s not the real you. So you’re protected. But the side effect is that if people love the clown … well, you know the truth. You know how different it’d be if they met the real you…

But there’s more. The jokes that keep the crowd happy – and keep the people around you at bay – come from inside you, and are dug painfully out of your own guts. You expose and examine your own insecurities, flaws, fears – all of that stuff makes the best fuel…

Did you ever have that funny friend, the class-clown type, who one day just stopped being funny around you?… Be there when they need you, and keep being there even when they stop being funny. Every time they make a joke around you, they’re doing it because they instinctively and reflexively think that’s what they need to do to make you like them. They’re afraid that the moment the laughter stops, all that’s left is that gross, awkward kid everyone hated on the playground, the one they’ve been hiding behind bricks all their adult life. If they come to you wanting to have a conversation about their problems, don’t drop hints that you wish they’d “lighten up.” It’s really easy to hear that as “Man, what happened to the clown? I liked him better…”

From Cracked


Rest in peace, Robin. The countless moments of joy and laughter you gave to others will never be forgotten…


From http://simono1968.wordpress.com

THE END

Hidden scars

Girl1
From
Tumblr.com

When did it become so hard,
To tell the truth,
And show our scars?
When did we decide that we,
Must hide our hurt,
Our pain,
And flee,
To distant lands,
Within our heads,
Emotions hidden,
Dulled and dead,
Never to be shared aloud,
Instead we’re silent,
Smiling,
Proud.
Proud of juggling life so well,
Proud we manage not to tell,
Proud our lives look good to all,
But pride’s what comes before a fall.
And so we hide hurt rather well,
But deep inside it starts to swell,
Until we’re taken with the tide,
Of all the things we tried to hide,
And then our secrets are no more,
Our problems spill upon the floor,
Seeping, sliding making mess,
Whilst others sidestep,
We confess,
We couldn’t manage any more.
We hid our scars but they’re still raw.

By PookyH

Sorrows Coldness
From Beware the Barrenness of a busy Life

THE END

You see a smile…

All the world’s a stage,
And all the men and women merely players…

(From Shakespeare’s ‘As You Like It’, 1600)

Teatr
(‘All the world’s a stage’ by Vitaly Vorobiev)

***

You see a smile
And look away.
“She’s not depressed.”
I hear you say.
“She’s smiling, laughing, full of fun.”
Believe me,
I’m not the only one
Who’s sad inside,
But brave of face,
Trying hard not to embrace
The Demons lurking just within,
Stretching, poking at my skin.
They want to make their presence known,
And make me feel quite alone,
With Demons as my company.
That mustn’t happen.
Not to me.
So full of hate, despair and bile,
I’ll wear my mask
And force a smile.

by PookyH

THE END