Tag Archives: Joke

by

Dad’s lessons and jokes

Dads…. We may respect them, appreciate them, get annoyed by them, or laugh at their jokes. However one thing is for sure: We wouldn’t be who we are without them. And so often their jokes turn out to be some of life’s most important lessons…

One of my dad’s favourite songs was about a friend…

Once when he heard this song on the radio, he said: “Like with friends, do not be in a rush selecting a life partner… Take your chosen one up a high mountain with you… And if he survives your sense of humour, bring him home – I’ll have a look…” 😉

Funnily enough, we lived in a flat part of the country with not a single hill in sight…. 😂😂😂

Father and Daughter

What was the best advice you ever got from your dad?

by

Install Giggle 24.7 and run it every day :-)

From http://imgbuddy.com

A woman writes to the IT Technical support…..

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5,and then installed undesirable programs such as NEWS 5.0, MONEY 3.0 and CRICKET 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed,

Desperate

REPLY

DEAR Madam,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: Ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT in any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Good Looks 7.7.

Good Luck!

From https://madamsabi.wordpress.com

Whether you recently said “I do” or just celebrated a double-digit anniversary, you can probably spout off a lot of info about your husband—his middle name, where he was born, his favorite food. But knowing these 10 other things can bring you closer than ever. Find out why, and try these relationship strategies to ensure your husband is anything but a mystery.From http://www.womansday.com

Install Giggle 24.7 and run it every day… 

😉

THE END

by

Toast to the Men from the Obedient Wives

( Photo by Valery Tavasiev )

Here’s to the men! Since Adam’s time
They’ve always been the same;
Whenever anything goes wrong,
The woman is to blame.
From early morn to late at night,
The men fault-finders are;
They blame us if they oversleep,
Or if they miss a car.
They blame us if, beneath the bed,
Their collar buttons roll;
They blame us if the fire is out
Or if there is no coal.
They blame us if they cut themselves
While shaving, and they swear
That we’re to blame if they decide
To go upon a tear.

Here’s to the men, the perfect men!
Who never are at fault;
They blame us if they chance to get
The pepper for the salt.
They blame us if their business fails,
Or back a losing horse;
And when it rains on holidays
The fault is ours, of course.
They blame us when they fall in love,
And when they married get;
Likewise they blame us when they’re sick,
And when they fall in debt.
For everything that crisscross goes
They say we are to blame;
But, after all, here’s to the men,
We love them just the same!

by Edgar Albert Guest (1881-1959)

( Photo by eduard z )

* * *

Card
From ROTTENeCARDS

😉

THE END