Parenting theories, lessons and tips

“Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children, and no theories.”

John Wilmot

I have three children only and a million of theories, which all turned out to be just a trial and error in practice. Parenting is as crazy as circumnavigating the world without a map…but, oh, what a journey, what an adventure! Journey that at times felt agonisingly frustrating and was driving me absolutely mad! Journey that helped me to get to know myself better and re-evaluate a lot of things in life. Journey that taught me:

  • to focus on enjoying the ride rather than getting to the destination
  • to stop being perfectionist: there are no perfect children, but there are plenty of perfect moments with them
  • to be kind to myself: after all the only ‘perfect’ parents are those who never had children…

And that journey does not end when they become adults. Today I came across an article on parenting adult children with some useful tips:

  • Recognise and respect your differences
  • Discover your own strengths and weaknesses as a parent
  • Let them learn from their own mistakes
  • Avoid making them choose between you and their family
  • No unsolicited advice – let them take their own decisions without interrupting them.

I would also add to this list ‘get your own life sorted’, take care of your own happiness and well-being. On airplanes we are always advised to put our oxygen mask first before helping our children? If we run out of oxygen ourselves, we can hardly provide any help to them…

What are your key parenting lessons or tips?

parenting-quote

Credits:

 

What have you learnt as a child?

If a child lives with criticism
He learns to condemn.

If a child lives with hostility
He learns to fight.

If a child lives with ridicule
He learns to be shy.

If a child lives with tolerance
He learns to be patient.

If a child lives with encouragement
He learns confidence.

If a child lives with praise
He learns to appreciate.

If a child lives with fairness
He learns justice.

If a child lives with security
He learns faith.

If a child lives with approval
He learns to like himself.

If a child lives with acceptance and friendship
He learns to find love in the world.. !

What have you learnt as a child?


ENDS

This can happen to anyone…

“I dream of giving birth to a child who will ask, Mother, what was war?”

Eve Merriam

This is what war does to children…

Can’t stop thinking about children suffering from war in places of my childhood where I felt so happy and safe as a child.

Syria, Ukraine, Russia, BosniaAfghanistan, Iraq, Chechnya… – this can happen to anyone 😦

Sevenly

Image from pinterest.

ENDS

Strong Is The New Pretty AND Be Yourself Is The New Happy

Have you seen the “Strong Is The New Pretty” photo series by Kate Parker?

Kate, a photographer based in Atlanta, Georgia, is proud of her two daughters (Ella, 9, and Alice, 6) and takes beautiful photos to capture them the way she sees them.

strong-is-the-new-pretty-kate-parker-31
“I wanted this series of images to show their boldness, their strength and the beauty in them, as they are,” Parker writes on her website.

“My girls know that who they are is just perfect. Their silly, adventurous, frustrated, happy, LOUD, athletic, fierce, funny selves. They don’t need to have their hair done, clothes matching, or even be clean to be loved or accepted. Strong is the new pretty.“

strong-is-the-new-pretty-kate-parker-6

Strong Is The New Pretty
AND
Be Yourself Is The New Happy

🙂

strong-is-the-new-pretty-kate-parker-7

From http://www.boredpanda.com

THE END

Fathers in today’s modern families can be so many things…

“Fathers in today’s modern families can be so many things.”

Oliver Hudson

From http://www.wrightsmedia.com

“My friends Katie and Scott… are both Silicon Valley entrepreneurs who work full-time. About a year ago, Scott travelled to the East Coast for work. He was starting a late-morning meeting when his phone rang. His team only heard one side of the conversation.

“A sandwich, carrot sticks, a cut-up apple, pretzels, and a cookie,” Scott said. He hung up smiling and explained that his wife was asking what she should put in the kids’ lunch boxes. Everyone laughed. …

There’s an epilogue to their story. Scott went on a trip and discovered that Katie forgot to make the kids’ lunches altogether. She realized her slipup midmorning and solved the problem by having a pizza delivered to the school cafeteria. Their kids were thrilled, but Scott was not. Now when he travels, he packs lunches in advance and leaves notes with specific instructions for his wife…”

From ‘Lean in’ by Sheryl Sandberg

lunchbox-dad-1From Lunchbox dad

“The may be an evolutionary basis for one parent knowing better what to put in a child’s lunch. Women who breast-feed are arguable baby’s first lunch box. But even if mothers are more naturally inclined toward nurturing, fathers can match that skill with knowledge and effort…

We overcome biology with consciousness in other areas. For example, storing large amounts of fat was necessary to survive when food was scarce, so we evolved to crave it and consume it when it’s available. But in this era of plenty, we no longer need large amounts of fuel in reserve, so instead of simply giving in to this inclination, we exercise and limit caloric intake.

We use willpower to combat biology, or at least we try. So even if ‘mother knows best’ is rooted in biology, it need not be written in stone. A willing mother and a willing father are all it requires… As women must be more empowered at work, men must be more empowered at home.”

From ‘Lean in’ by Sheryl Sandberg

lunchbox-dad-4
From Lunchbox dad

Lunchbox Dad
From http://www.lunchboxdad.com/

Let’s appreciate such truly amazing dads!

🙂

THE END