The Bachelor’s Soliloquy

To avoid being blamed for favouring ladies after posting The Toast to the Men , I decided to post this soliloquy to reflect men’s perspective. Enjoy 🙂

To be

To wed, or not to wed; that is the question;
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The bills and house rent of a wedded fortune,
Or to say “nit” when she proposes,
And by declining cut her. To wed; to smoke
No more; And have a wife at home to mend
The holes in socks and shirts
And underwear and so forth. ’Tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wished. To wed for life;
To wed; perchance to fight; ay, there’s the rub;
For in that married life what fights may come,
When we have honeymooning ceased
Must give us pause; there’s the respect
That makes the joy of single life.
For who would bear her mother’s scornful tongue,
Canned goods for tea, the dying furnace fire;
The pangs of sleepless nights when baby cries;
The pain of barking shins upon a chair and
Closing waists that button down the back,
When he himself might all these troubles shirk
With a bare refusal? Who would bundles bear,
And grunt and sweat under a shopping load?
Who would samples match; buy rats for hair,
Cart cheese and crackers home to serve at night
For lunch to feed your friends; play pedro
After tea; sing rag time songs, amusing
Friendly neighbors. Buy garden tools
To lend unto the same. Stay home at nights
In smoking coat and slippers and slink to bed
At ten o’clock to save the light bills?
Thus duty does make cowards of us all,
And thus the native hue of matrimony
Is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of chores;
And thus the gloss of marriage fades away,
And loses its attraction.

by Edgar Albert Guest (1881-1959)

( Photo by Nemechtatel )

THE END

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “The Bachelor’s Soliloquy

  1. bkpyett says:

    What a charming poem, I love it!

  2. Jenni says:

    snicker on covering your butt… however that was really well phrased and I loved it.

  3. ridicuryder says:

    Otrazhenie,
    This guy on the bed is on to something, although I’m not sure I would display my bottles this way. On the other hand putting those buttons together (or undoing them) can be exquisite . . . I suppose a lot of this rides on what the small of that back opens in you. 🙂
    Mark

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s